Women have more to offer the world than just big boobs

September 16, 2007 at 9:06 am 6 comments

cleavageI have always thought it is a funny thing to watch an older man ogle a young girl who could easily be his daughter – and sometimes even his granddaughter. It is not like that grandpa has a chance in hell with that young beauty, but that does not stop him from falling all over himself to stop and watch her for as long as possible.

Why do we find such a sight funny? Well, basically because we expect an older gentleman to have learned how to display a bit more restraint in areas such as these. What is even worse is when these men make such a display of themselves right in front of their wives.

I simply love to point out the irony of the double standards of obvious socially acceptable behavior that exists between the two genders. For example, how many times have you ever seen a woman walking with her guy and nearly fall over a complete stranger while trying to catch a look at another man?

I can guarantee you that this is not something that occurs on a regular basis. Women just have too much respect for their men to act so unseemly. It is not as if women just don’t see the good-looking guys. They most certainly do see them and would love to stop and take in the scenery, but would not lower themselves to such a tasteless situation.

Yet it seems the older a guy gets, the more prone he is to openly eyeball a full bosom attached to a young face. What about his wife? You know, the woman who lost her own youthful figure when she bore his children? What about the woman who fixes his food everyday and cleans his home?

Surely this lady deserves enough of his respect to be able to walk next to him without the insolence of having him ogle another woman. Don’t tell me a man cannot control himself long enough to give his wife the respect she deserves for the 30 seconds it takes to pass another beautiful woman. That is just nonsense. He is not an animal without reason; all men have the capacity to consider another person’s feelings before he acts.

I don’t think a woman should ever be subjected to such atrocious behavior no matter what her age, but there is a point in her life when she is rightfully due an elevated amount of respect – which should of course include being able to take a walk with her husband without his eyes straying to every pretty young girl who walks by.

This brings me to another double standard – or rather, because of the aforementioned male behavior there has developed another set of standards that applies to women. It seems like a natural development that if even older men who have been married to the same woman for 20 or 30 years have to ogle young women – then his wife will oft times try to look younger so he will ogle her instead.

She should never be put in this position in the first place, but this double standard in society has women doing everything possible to try and look as young as possible for as long as possible. It is simply absurd for a woman of 50 to be expected to look like a fresh 20 year-old girl. There is something seriously wrong with society.

Society considers a man distinguished if he is in his 50s, balding, getting grey hair and wrinkling. Society allows men to grow old with respect. However, a woman in her 50s who is greying and getting wrinkles is considered old. Why are women not afforded the same respect?

Instead, she is expected to color her hair, fix the wrinkles and even get surgery if necessary – or she deserves nothing more than to be traded in for a newer model. Women are subjected to any number of unreasonable expectations and as a result her insecurity grows exponentially as she ages instead of being able to rest in the monumental achievements of her life.

ABC News Nightline recently aired an interview with the beautiful Isabella Rossellini in which she talked about being nigh onto 54 years old and the way that society handles a famed beauty as she gets older. She said that when people say, “Ah, you don’t look your age,” they think of it as a compliment, but it is the exact opposite.

I completely understand what she is talking about. I have people tell me I don’t look 38 all the time – as if there is something wrong with being 38. I am proud to be 38 and wouldn’t want to be 25 again for anything in the world. The older I get the more grounded I feel with the world and have no desire to return to the precarious position of being a younger woman again.

Isabella put it like this, “Isn’t it a bit like telling a gay guy you don’t look gay or a black person you don’t look black – your skin is not dark enough?” Why is it so difficult for society to accept that women who are in their 30s, 40s and 50s are still beautiful? Gloria Steinem once told someone who told her she didn’t look 40, “This is what 40 looks like.”

My mother-in-law, who is well past her 50s, is just as beautiful now as she was in her younger years. She is absolutely stunning, yet she still hates to let others know her age. What a pity that she has to pretend to be younger when she should be able to rest in the fact that she is beautiful no matter what her age.

This discrimination against women forces us to seek to become an unreachable idea and reduces us once again to nothing more than a pretty face to be admired. The longer women play along with these hypocritical double standards, the longer we will be expected to be naïve 20 year-olds instead of the wise and intelligent women we really are.

Ladies, we have so much more to offer the world than just big boobs.

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Entry filed under: feminism, feminist, Stella Ramsaroop, women, women's issues. Tags: , , .

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6 Comments Add your own

  • 1. vintagefan  |  September 16, 2007 at 11:59 am

    Boobs and Brains both in my case. I remember my mum telling me no one would marry me if I didn’t have an equal proliferation of both. Sadly all I had to offer was butt.
    I’ve been objectified by an middle-aged man, an old family friend. It was quite, quite gross because of the whole “oh my, how you’ve grown” thing. In the end he asked to take a photo with me and he slipped his hand around my waist. My parents were mortified but stayed quite for the sake of politeness. Then mailed us the photo like everything’s good…she’s just like my daughter etc. And yeah the guy did hold me when I was a baby, the thought of which makes me want to take a shower.

  • 2. KellyMac  |  September 17, 2007 at 1:03 am

    Um…hello? Boobies are fun to look at? Men are men. They re biologically predisposed to be attracted to the female figure. If youre offended that theyre looking, then cover up. Men have been looking at women since the beginning of men and women, and women have been trying to be looked at for the same amount of time. I guess I just dont understand why that would be a problem. I personally enjoy it when men look at me. Its a terrific ego boost. You cant just expect men to stop being men because you think its sexist.

  • 3. gotheek  |  September 21, 2007 at 11:23 pm

    The excuse that we should cover-up to prevent men looking is equivalent, I’m afraid, to the extremism exhibited by The Taliban and various extreme religions.

    Put it another way: the excuse of “she had exposed skin” has been used by rapists to get away with their crimes, and in some courts around the world, actually accepted as defenses!

    We disempower women if the excuse of “don’t like the attention, dress differently” is used to excuse the bad behaviour of others. The same as telling a bullied child to “stop behaving in a certain way” or “avoid the bully”.

    It is not the fault of the woman that many members of the male gender are pathologically unable to control their desires and lust, so why make it her problem?

  • 4. KellyMac  |  September 22, 2007 at 5:43 am

    Wow. How did we get from looking at something that attracts you to rape? If being looked at equals being raped, every person on the planet is guilty of being a serial rapist.

    Believe it or not, the vast majority of men would rather kill a rapist than let him live. Even in prison, men guilty of sexual offenses are the ones most often assaulted by the other prisoners.

    I’m sorry, I just don’t buy that anyone with a penis is a rapist or potential rapist. It just doesn’t fit in with real life experience or empirical evidence.

  • 5. Jennivieve  |  December 12, 2007 at 10:31 pm

    The point being made in the above blog was not so much that guys shouldn’t admire the female form, as much as guys should show some respect for their partners when such a form passes them on the street or where ever.
    I happily admire the view a beautiful man when I see one, but when I’m with my boyfriend: a) I’m usually less likely to notice such a specimen because I’m talking to or looking at my boyfriend; and b) I’d feel rude taking time out to stare at another guy, because it’s rude, and likely to breed insecurity within our relationship.
    I don’t think it is unreasonable to to expect the same in return.

  • 6. Anonymous  |  April 17, 2009 at 11:32 pm

    KellyMac, we’re not saying that looking at someone is equivalent to raping them. We’re saying that you’re using the same argument. You’re using the same “oh she deserves it for not covering up!” argument that the pro-rapists do.

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